Here’s who I was in 2011:
1. A Knight
Someone I met recently told me I am a knight. On top of my
horse, sword and shield, shining armour, crossing the world on a mission. According to this
person apparently even my motorcycles are a symbol of my “knight-like”
tendencies.
2. A Nomad
100 plus flights per year, approx. 20-25 countries, more
than 50% of my nights in a bed that is not mine, no fixed abodes to speak of, "homes" of a kind in several places and also in none, a wardrobe for all seasons, a suitcase in every corner, empty hangers in the closet . . . yes - I was a nomad.
3. A Leader
I lead people. Some 350 – 400 in my business life. It is my
duty and my destiny to lead people. I follow other leaders. It can be very
lonely at the front. No-one prepares you for this role.
4. A Friend
I was a friend to many, as many were friends to me. I went
the extra mile for them. Because I wanted to, not because I was obliged. That
is friendship.
5. An Idealist
I was an idealist in that I don’t believe that anything
exists outside of my mind’s ability to conceive it. I was also an idealist in
the sense of holding ideals above other matters. And finally I was an idealist
in terms of temperament: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idealist_temperament
(NB. I am the “Champion” or ENFP)
6. A Journeyman
Last year I explored and discovered much that was unknown to
me and thus brought my future into the present (and quickly into the past). I
journeyed through lands, people and most of all through my mind in 2011.
7. A Catalyst
Apparently I helped a few people out in 2011, got their
backs, listened to their pain, pushed them to be better, and so on. I am not a
savior – people save their own selves – but I was sometimes a helper or a
catalyst. I'm glad for that.
8. An Observer
I wrote and I wrote in 2011. On my blog here, and in books,
notepads, computers and so on. I wrote essays, poems, memos, sketches,
portraits and philosophized endlessly about what I saw in the world and in my
self. Writing things down helped me find inspiration, clarity and energy. I was
an observer.
9. A Student
I learned people and from people. I learned new ideas, new
methods, new perspectives – I watched, I observed, I thought, but I also
studied. Formally and informally. I was a student.
10. A Creator
I wrote and recorded a bunch of music last year. I started
playing the piano more often – even after my amputation – and worked harder on
songwriting and composition focusing on writing more complex and interesting
music. I wrote poetry and prose compositions again, penned sketches and
scherzos of people and life and I made new things happen. I was a creator.
11. A Destroyer
I destroyed many things and damaged more. Strangled and
sabotaged, drowned and overwhelmed, starved and neglected, rejected and
terrified, abandoned and abused. Some of the things I destroyed will be reborn.
Some of those I damaged will repair. Others will not. I was a destroyer.
