Over the last 12 days - the first of 2012 - I have reviewed and reflected on different aspects of my 2011. From people to places, sounds to images etc. It has been a pretty thorough review and at times quite raw and difficult.
So . . . what does it all mean? Where am I going to go with all the things I’ve digested, created, learned and shared in 2011? Who am I going to spend time with? How am I going to spend my time? Where am I going to spend my time?
But life is also too short not to spend the maximum amount of time with the people we really care about and who really interest us.
This year I want to spend time on the relationships that are most important to me. On my family, my close friends, my good buddies - and also on the random but important and valuable connections I have made with people across the globe.
But not on "acquaintances" and the like - I'm sorry but that time belongs to my friends.
And if you are wondering which category you fall into, you have probably just answered your own question.
So . . . what does it all mean? Where am I going to go with all the things I’ve digested, created, learned and shared in 2011? Who am I going to spend time with? How am I going to spend my time? Where am I going to spend my time?
I don’t believe in resolutions or New Year promises that
exist as a stress and only to be broken. I am much more interested in exploring
the things that I really WANT to do. If the things I WANT to do align with the
THINGS I “should” do then I may have a chance of doing them, n’est-ce pas?
Most of the things I want to do in 2012 are really just
building on what I’ve been doing in 2011 (although there are some things I did
in 2011 or happened to me in 2011 that I definitely want to avoid). Some,
however, mark significant departure and change…
Here are the 12 for 2012:
Here are the 12 for 2012:
1. Be more
compassionate . . .
I want to continue to work on being compassionate – first to
myself and then to others. I am sometimes rather hard on myself – and often
allow myself to feel very disappointed in myself and the things I do. While it
is perhaps helpful to be self-censoring and to maintain a level of
self-criticism or at least slef-awareness, it is important not to end up being
tougher on oneself than one really needs to be.
So I will forgive myself, I will give to myself and I will
take care of myself by respecting who and what I am and valuing that properly
and appropriately.
I include a short video on compassion from The Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and
Education at Stanford University in
California. I think it is great that a university like Stanford has set up a
center like this and is focusing on this area. People are taking this
compassion business pretty seriously . . .
2. Let go of the past . . .
I want to put the past
- not just 2011 – behind me. Not to forget about it – obviously – but to
leave it where it is. In the past. I
love history and all that it can tell us, but I believe I have relied too much
on the past in my life and need to be much more present in the here and now.
Talking of letting go of the past – and binning it - check
out this amazing initiative which a friend shared on FaceBook – really impressive
and a neat idea.
3. Play, write &
listen to more music . . .
I didn’t play or write as much music as I could have done in
2011 – mainly due to injuries and time.
This year I want to work on my piano playing,
write more music and songs and most of all I want to listen to more music –
especially classical and jazz.
It’s a simple thing and I know it will feel great. I’ve
missed my music!
4. Giving up things (to
take care of myself better) . . .
I have given a lot of thought to the things I really don’t
need in my life and which prevent me or obstruct me from taking better care of
myself.
There are few things which I think it is right to give up
absolutely – other than cigarettes (which I have almost given up but still
indulge in periodically) – but there are several things which I can stop
pushing and relegate significantly in terms of my involvement / consumption /
interest.
I am going to reduce the amount of motorcycles I own and the amount of motorcycling I do. I am going to continue to ride occasionally in the desert
and will probably do a little bit of touring in Europe or the US, but I think that starting track
riding and racing, continuing a lot of road riding and so on is pushing my luck
in terms of age, injuries and resilience. Not time yet to hang up my helmet,
but definitely time to accept I’m not 20 any more and make this a smaller part of my leisure time.
I’m also going to reduce my other bad habits - such as bad
food, over-travelling and over general over-indulgence . . .and hopefully get a little bit of a better balance in terms of how I spend my free time.
I want to become more moderate and not push myself so hard
to do things which are dangerous, tiring or just plain bad for me.
5. Taking up things (to
take care of myself better) . . .
To balance some of the things I am going to reduce, I want to
increase some of the things that are actively good for me.
No extreme targets or promises here, but simple
recalibration of time and effort to include more healthy and soothing things –
including regular exercise - even if it
is just a brisk walk, get back to doing some basic and simple yoga, continuing
a healthy balanced diet, and perhaps most fundamental of all – getting plenty
of good rest and sleep.
Simple – but worth focusing on a little.
6. Relationships . . .
Life is too short to spend it with assholes, losers, painful people, rude people, stupid people. We all know that.
This year I want to spend time on the relationships that are most important to me. On my family, my close friends, my good buddies - and also on the random but important and valuable connections I have made with people across the globe.
But not on "acquaintances" and the like - I'm sorry but that time belongs to my friends.
And if you are wondering which category you fall into, you have probably just answered your own question.
7. Travel a road less
travelled . . .
I mean this in both a literal and metaphorical sense.
I want to do more travel to places I don’t know instead of
places I do – or at least bring that back into a better balance. I’ve fallen into the
habit in the last few years of spending my leisure travel predominantly in
places that I know and have been to before. I want to see some new places in
2012 and have some new experiences.
Metaphorically I also want to try new things, think in new
ways and encounter new experiences in all forms. I love change and have
appetite for new things – and I am working on being more open minded about the
opportunities to do these kind of things.
Here’s to the road less travelled – I’ll write about it when
I get there.
8. Write a short
story (or maybe two) . . .
I’ve done a lot of writing this year – mainly essays on this
blog, some travel pieces, and food writing and a little “creative” writing.
A number of kind people (and I hope in possession of
intelligence and good judgment too) have said positive things about my writing
and encouraged me to do more.
As writing provides both therapy and self-expression for me,
I am not at all adverse to this and have decided that I am going to focus on
writing one (at least) fictional short story this year. Something that I will
write with great care, that I will edit with sensitivity and brevity as equal goals –
and which I hope will reflect both my creative passion and my point of view on
the subjects I write about. I hope I can produce something evocative and
inspiring.
To the few people I have mentioned this too already – thank
you for the kind offers to proof read, criticize, comment and generally
support.
9. Spend more time in
Greece . . .
This may sound at odds with point 7, but I have realized
that I have never really gotten over my love affair with Greece and remain
deeply attached to her. To this end I must spend more time there to allow
myself to feel comfortable and satiated.
If you’ve ever loved a place that’s not your home, you will
know what I mean.
10. Love a little
better . . .
This applies to all the kinds of relationships I have –
friendship and beyond. I don’t consider myself weak or deficient particularly
in this area - but I know I can be a little more thoughtful, a little more
sensitive, a little less demanding and just a little “less” sometimes.
As Ovid, the Roman poet wrote: “If you would be loved, be
loveable”.
11. Get to know my
brother . . .
As referenced in my first piece in the review of 2011, I
have neglected my relationship with my brother and I realize this has cost me –
and him – and I wish to rectify that.
I plan to spend more time with him this year and to spend
specific time travelling with him to get to know him better.
I am looking forward to that journey.
12. Epilogue . . .
In conclusion, I’m simply going to enjoy more of the things
I love in life, and do less of the things I don’t want or need anymore.
And I'm going to keep on writing about them - whether just plain description and observation or more analytical and philosophical - because I enjoy that too.
I leave 2011 with this quote – from a slightly unusual
source perhaps – but I think it says a lot:
“Happiness is the
consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon
it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to
participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. And once
you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about
maintaining it. You must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that
happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.”
Elizabeth Gilbert – Eat, Pray, Love
